Hello Lavin, I am your doula and I was also your brother’s doula. My name is Karen. This is the story of your birth, as I was honored to witness it. On Wednesday August 24th, 2016 Danica sent me a text that said “I am starting to get consistent contractions.” Apparently this started at about 7am. So I called her and learned that they were ironically close, yet short and seemingly feeble compared to what she remembered her last birth being like. I learned that they might be closer than expected for the beginning of labor because she had created some “friction” with your Dad that morning to add to those sensations. Plus, I already knew that she was trying some things to get your birth going like pumping and clary sage. I assured her that it would be soon and probably she just jump-started the process. But just in case, she should drink lots of water and maybe even try the bath to slow it down if this was really signs of dehydration. I told her I would continue to check in with her. I lived further away now compared to when your brother was born, so I wanted to make sure I was closer if need be. Even though her “surges” (contractions) were close, they were short and she stated that she was going to try and nap, so I was very prepared but not rushing down. Later on I learned that she wasn’t really napping, rather, she was crying out to God at her parent’s house, hugging pillows, and worshiping. She felt like she was really getting into her birthing body, like all mammals, being alone and going deep mentally. And she remembered her friend Mina’s encouragement to focus on “Euphoria.” This was where Kamden was left with your grandparents for the rest of the birth. I called your Dad because I knew that sometimes your mom can be too kind and not wish me to come even though I should. I asked him to tell me what he thought once he saw her. He was on his way to pick her up from her parent’s house. At this time I was at my daughter’s school, trying to let her finish lunch before checking her out and taking both of my girls to their grandparents on the way to the birth. At 12:15 I planned to check her out whether or not Danica said she wanted me, simply because if it’d been continuing on that long since the morning, surely, it would pick up soon. EXACTLY at 12:15 your Dad texted me that she asked me to come. I flew down the freeway and met their grandma right off an exit to drop the girls off. I had to pee the entire time and that was good motivation to go fast too. Drew described the surges as stronger and longer only beginning right before this. So we wouldn’t have categorized her active labor to officially start until around 12pm. After I dropped the girls off, I told Drew how far away I was in surges. “I’m only 5-6 surges away!” I texted. Which is about twenty minutes. He said that Danica was thinking it was time to go to the hospital soon. Maybe she was worried about getting to the hospital in time for antibiotics being GBS positive? I thought. I reminded your Dad that as long as your water was intact, there was no exposure to any bacteria. When I arrived to your house it was 1:20pm. Drew opened the gate for me and he said that the surges were really strong and close. I figured, okay, maybe it was going fast but I was glad to be there to make sure. I walked past Rosa, the cleaning lady who was there the whole time. When I saw Danica, I began to wonder even more. She was leaning over their bed and had worship music playing. Her legs were crossed at her calves. I giggled quietly because it reminded me of what she would do during your brother’s birth. I pointed to that so your Dad could see. I wondered if maybe she was just having trouble embracing the pressure and your Dad and I tried to help her release her muscles more. We rubbed her back and encouraged her to try another position. But then she said that she had just went to the restroom and wiped and felt something inside (about two inches up she said). I learned later that was about 15 minutes before I’d arrived. We discussed how maybe that was a bulging bag of water like last time. There was no sign of a natural expulsive reflux at all. A bulging bag would make sense because when women squeeze their muscles in their lower half, sort of tensing with the pressure, the bag of water will often bulge out. There was no other sign of progress, no bloody show, no urge to push, no shaking. She did vomit once right before I got there though. So we prayed for God’s perfect timing, and I asked her to use her discernment (not any thoughts prompted by fear) to help us make a good decision. She said she didn’t think we were going to make it and we should leave. So then I asked Drew to prepare the car and I asked her to go back to the toilet and feel again. It would be good to go to the bathroom anyways before leaving and this gave Drew a chance to get the car ready. So I stood outside the bathroom door, halfway looking in to make sure she was okay. This is where everything went from speedy to lightning fast. I had just texted her friend (a mutual friend of mine too, Jessica) that I didn’t think we were going to make it. Danica then exclaimed, “Karen I feel his head. We’re not going to make it are we.” I knew we weren’t then for sure, but I wanted to keep her calm, so I said “That’s okay, I’ll see if I can get this bath ready in time.” But when I reached towards the bath, she completely calmly stated, “I’m crowning.” I looked and responded equally as steadily, “yes you are, please get off the toilet, here’s a towel, get on your hands and knees, we don’t want a baby in the toilet.” She had barely felt only a tiny bit pushy. As she came off the toilet, she squatted. We estimate this time to be 1:46pm. I popped my head out the bathroom and yelled to Drew “DREW CALL 911 AND GET IN HERE.” He came immediately, and I calmed my voice back down and said, “You can come help receive your baby, get behind Danica.” I don’t think he spoke much, just did exactly what I said, which was perfect! He handed me the phone where the 911 operator was already there. Your head came out as your mom squatted, and then she moved to her hands and knees. When he saw that the head was out but the sac remained covering your face he was confused and reluctantly spoke, “is he okay?” I reminded him that it was totally fine because you didn’t need to breathe yet. I said, “Just wait for the next surge and watch, his head will turn and the shoulders will come out.” We estimate at 1:47 or 1:48pm the rest of your body slipped right out. And slippery it was! Your Dad received you so well with both hands. You were in his arms. Your sac broke around your midsection while you were on the way out, so I explained how Drew could just lift it right over your head. I remember so much of this time being between myself and your Dad. I assume Danica was just with Jesus, because she was completely calm and birthed you blissfully. Drew and I explained to her how she needed to lift her right leg over your cord. And she did confidently and received you in her arms immediately. I helped get you more on your tummy for skin to skin, as I halfheartedly answered the 911 operator’s questions. The 911 operator was making me laugh because of the ridiculous things she was saying, like go get a shoe string for the cord. I responded, “No I think we’ll let baby get all his oxygen from the cord.” She said someone was on their way so I hung up and tended to Danica. I got her some pillows to rest on and your Dad got more towels to keep you warm. Everything was perfect! You were breathing and crying just fine. Your color and movement was great too. You actually stopped crying quickly and just peacefully rested on your mom. I checked to make sure her bleeding wasn’t too much and it was okay at this time. I explained to your parents how the paramedic team would be asking a lot of questions and might rush us, but to take their time and make sure they speak up for what they want, like skin to skin for the ride there. I also took this time to try and help Danica get you latched, but you seemed to be less than ready. Understandably, because you were probably shocked how fast it was too! We tried to do some manual nipple stimulation instead to help the placenta deliver. The paramedics who came work for the same company as my husband and I knew they have strict rules against skin to skin for the ambulance transport, so your Dad and I both vocalized that desire clearly. We know their names were Steve, Kenny, and Heidi (among others from the fire department), so they deserve a big thank you! They did say some pretty comical things though, and I could tell that the main paramedic who was helping us was very nervous. So I answered all his questions and explained some things for him. Like how he thought the baby needed to remain lower than the placenta, and how he thought you had to aspirate the baby even though you were already breathing just fine, and how he thought we should wipe off your vernix (your God-given antibacterial protectant). Where it was especially funny was when I learned that it had been 30 minutes since your birth and the placenta still wasn’t delivered, so I explained to all 6 emergency medical professionals that we should try and see if Danica can push it out. They all agreed, but they all turned their heads and left the bathroom. I asked for some gloves and they were happy to give me whatever I needed so they didn’t have to do it. I don’t know if I’ll ever stop laughing at that memory. I tried to help Danica push your placenta out, but it wouldn’t come. We tried a few different positions and I worried that without any medication to stop bleeding it would be unsafe to keep her there any longer. So the paramedics got the gurney ready. Your Dad got Danica her big black robe that said “Rock Star.” As your mom laid down, your Dad held you skin to skin on himself. Drew, once again, spoke to the paramedics explaining that they would keep you on your mom for the ride. And thank God they obliged! Your parents were all smiles and realized some really amazing things about your birth. Like the fact that the rugs in the bathroom that were probably ruined, already had replacements because Amazon.com accidently sent Danica 4 instead of 2! And the fact that you were born en caul (in your sac) which meant that you literally had not one bit of exposure to GBS. Although GBS illness in babies is very rare (3 in 10,000), because your brother was in the NICU after his birth, your parents were praying for that peace of mind. Unfortunately, the one thing that was not ideal was that Danica lost a lot of blood. When they arrived at Sharp Grossmont, they calculated about 1500ccs. Your mom actually passed out! Poor Drew, what a scary moment that must have been. That was a greater blood loss than the nurse or myself has ever seen. So thank God she came to quickly and was fine after that. She didn’t need a blood transfusion, and we all found food for her to hopefully build her strength back up. When I found your parents in room 16, they were with a darling nurse Sara. She was a home birther herself! She was so nice and accommodating for your parents’ wishes. Dr.Vu (her main doctor) came in later to remind Danica that he said not to have the baby at home, haha! All the grandparents came with wide eyes and amazement at what just happened. Kamden, saw you for the first time and he seemed interested, but also interested in snacks from Grandma. He started typing on the computer in the room, so maybe he was trying to help with your records. Later on, your parents learned that the second GBS test Danica did was in fact positive, so this was further evidence that your birth was truly an answer to prayer. Who knows, if we had made it to the hospital, it might have gone too fast and a different doctor might have routinely broken your water as they often do. Although, the doctor who was there, Dr. Fulford, did seem to be very helpful and kind delivering your placenta. By the time I left you, you were nursing like a champ. For a long time actually and very strong! I drove home calling my midwife friend and incoherently leaving a message about how beautiful the birth was. But as I spoke I realized something even more miraculous. You are Lavin Zachary, Zachary after your Dad’s best friend who’s life was ended much shorter than expected only a year prior. God allowed your Dad to redeem life, by recieving the miracle of life as profoundly marvelous as it could possibly be – right into his hands. And as I drove away, your parents realized that your birth weight was the late Zachary’s birth DAY! 8-12 (you were 8lbs 12 ounces). To say that heaven rained down on your birth is an understatement. I always knew I would hold your mom Danica in a special place in my heart, but now this birth is also going to be the most unforgettable and truly extraordinary experience I will cherish forever. Thank you again, for allowing me into your family to help with your parent’s journey to birthing. I am in awe at God’s grace and favor over your family. I believe that you and your brother will grow up with strong parents who teach you to trust in the Lord, because they have already lived through the ups and downs with faith. You were destined for greatness Lavin, I can’t wait to see you walk out your God-given purpose. Lavin Zachary 8lbs 12oz 14inch head (no tearing for mom!) 21inches long Born en caul at home
1 Comment
Lori
8/30/2016 07:50:42 pm
What a Awesome story. I'm so proud of you Danica, you're such a beautiful strong woman,mother and wife. You are truly blessed. LOVE YOU and thanks for sharing your precious moment's. ♡♡♡♡.
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Karen Brann
Birth Doula, Childbirth Educator, Lactation Educator/Counselor Archives
July 2019
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